For a while now I’ve been trying to wrap my head around what is wrong with this world. Why so many people – myself included some days – have such a bleak view of the future. What precisely is it that we do that causes so much grief in the world? And what we might do differently to – frankly – save humankind, because I fear we are close now to that point when unless we do something differently, we may not survive in a recognisable way into the next centuary.
I came across this post about a letter the performer Fiona Apple wrote 10 years ago to her fans when she cancelled the South American leg of her tour to be with her dying dog.
Here’s an extract from that letter:
“Sometimes it takes me 20 minutes just to decide what socks to wear to bed. But this decision is instant. These are the choices we make, which define us. I will not be the woman who puts her career ahead of love & friendship” (Read the full letter here https://www.themarginalian.org/2012/11/22/fiona-apple-janet-letter/)
That sort of courageous differently-empowered decision making is what I believe we need for the future of humankind on this planet.
Here’s why …
In 2008 I crashed out of my successful IT career of 24 years with a nervous breakdown. I was sacked from the contract the following day and paid notice to not come back. I was furious.
But to this day, I do not know whether I would have left that 6-figure job of my own volition. I have a nasty feeling that I wouldn’t. I would have valued that money so much that I would have put up with more unhealthy things.
The women in my life and that I see in the world naturally place so much more emphasis on compassion, on love, on the rightness of things for all people. I pride myself on not being a “normal” man; I aim to listen well, to communicate well, to allow space for people and not just solutions; to champion safety for everyone. Even so, the women I know see things that are only obvious to me once they are pointed out.
They are simply wired differently to me. And I deeply value that difference. It is not an alternative way. It is not a competition. It is an inherently different way; these are not opposing ways of operating, they cohabit beautifully when allowed.
Our current society is masculine-energy-dominated. I deliberately don’t say male dominated because I believe that is too simplistic. There is an over-emphasis on power, accumulation, wealth, plans, outcomes, control, on doing, on single-point focus, on getting the result, on rules … that is essentially masculine. My belief is that – going forwards – we need a far more feminine-energy dominant system because that is able to include the softer, the heart-centred, the people-centric, the “what’s right” approch and – crucially – to value those aspects as much as – if not more than – the others.
I don’t mean to imply that there aren’t men who can and do do this, because there are – I aim to be one myself for goodness sake. Nor do I suggest that there aren’t women who play the masculine control and power game every bit as well as the men (better sometimes). I know there are because I’ve worked for some of them.
What I am saying is that we need more feminine-energy in corporate, fiscal, local, national and global decision-making if we are to survive as a species on this planet because it’s the feminine worldview that will value and prioritise the challenging aspects of the decisions we need to make next.
